Girls of Paper and Fire by Natasha Ngan

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ARC provided by Hachette in exchange for an honest review.

“We might be Paper Girls, easily torn and written upon. The very title we’re given suggests that we are blank, waiting to be filled. But what the Demon King and his court do not understand is that paper is flammable. And there is a fire catching among us.”

Once I heard that this was an ownvoices Asian inspired fantasy world where two girls, who are forced to be concubines to a demon king, try to overcome it all and fall in love, I knew this was going to be a book for me. But friends, I fell in love. Girls of Paper and Fire will make it onto my best books of 2018 list come December.

In this world, there are castes that people are born into which determine your social standing in the world:

Paper – Humans. Lowest class. They look just like you and me.
Steel – Half human, half demon. Middle class. Look mostly human but will have a little bit of an animal attribute.
Moon – Demons. Highest class. Take on animal characteristics.

“Demon men can take what they want. Our homes. Our lives. Our bodies.”

And each year, the demon King takes eight paper girls to be concubines; some willing, others completely unwillingly. And these eight girls will live an entire year in the palace, living somewhat in the life a luxury, waiting to see if the King will call one of them to his chamber every night. And the impression they leave on the king will impact how their future goes after the year is up. And no girl can afford to make a mistake, because they will be punished in unthinkable ways.

This story stars a young girl named Lei, whose mother was ripped out of her life and taken by the king seven years ago. She has since grown up in a remote village with her father. But even though Lei is Paper caste, she has golden demon eyes that make her very unforgettable. So, palace guards eventually come for her. And this year, Lei gets taken to become one of the King’s paper girls.

“But perhaps the gods have forgotten us, or grown bored with our small corner of the kingdom. Because here I am, about to share the last thing I’d ever want to offer the King. Myself.”

To me, this is a book about rape, and rape culture, and how rape survivors will reclaim their bodies in all the different ways. And how rape is always about power, never about sex. This book is about how rapists can be charming, good looking, friendly, and have the entire world at their feet. It doesn’t matter. This is a book about reclaiming your body after someone forcibly takes it. And how everyone heals differently at their own pace.

Content and trigger warnings for rape, attempted rape, sexual assault, slavery, sex trafficking, abandonment, heavy grief depictions, loss of a loved one, murder, abduction, captivity, torture, branding, violence, a forced medical/health exam, physical abuse, graphic animal death, and war themes. Please use caution, this book can get pretty dark at times. Make sure you are in the right headspace.

“Order was restored the only way the King knew how. Bloodshed.”

This book is also about finding love; for others but also for yourself. And it is about finding your worth and knowing that you are worthy of love regardless of what has happened to you in your life. The world can be such an ugly place, but unconditional love still hides within it, and it’s so very beautiful. And love is always worth not only a risk, but it’s worth everything. And the f/f romance in this? One of my favorites of all time. It’s slow burn, but I say that in the best way possible. Without a question, my biggest ship of 2018 is within this book’s pages.

“Her kisses heal the parts of me that the King broke. They tell me: You are strong, Lei. You are beautiful. You are mine. And, always, most important: You are yours.”

And not only is the story amazing; Natasha Ngan’s writing is out of the world. I was completely captivated by the world and felt completely teleported into this world. And the masterpiece that she created? So damn impressive. My amazing friend, May let me in on some of Natasha’s inspirations with the paper girls and the regions they are from, and I’m just blown away. It’s so impressive the amount of work and love this author truly put into this story. This is seriously a work of art, and it just made me appreciate and love this world, characters, and book even more.

Overall, this meant so much to me. From the messages and the themes, to just me seeing queer, Asian girls falling in love against a world that wants to tear them apart, it meant everything. Yet, this book does end on a massive cliffhanger, so be warned. But it has hyped me so much to see what Natasha will do next! And book two will for sure be one of my most anticipated releases of 2019. But in the meantime, I can’t wait for the rest of the world to fall in love with the start of this amazing story.

“Our kingdom believes words have power. That the characters of our language can bless or curse a life.”

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The quotes above were taken from an ARC and are subject to change upon publication.

Dude read with Em at Runaway with Dream Thieves! ❤

June 2018 TBR

Hey, loves! June is Pride Month here in The United States. So, I’m going to read a lot of books this month and guess what they are going to be? 🌈

This June I’m going to read as many LGBTQIAP+ stories as I can, and I’m so hyped for it. And hopefully you all will be excited too, because I have some amazing books on this list. And I hope and pray my pan heart loves every single one of them! 💖💛💙

These Rebel Waves (Stream Raiders #1) by Sara Raasch:
ARC – August 7th, 2018, by Balzer + Bray
It’s been a hot second since I’ve read Snow Like Ashes, but wild horses couldn’t keep me away from anything that makes all my Goodreads friends scream “gay pirates” in all their prereviews! I’m so here for it.

Sawkill Girls by Claire Legrand:
ARC – October 2nd, 2018, by Katherine Tegen Books
I’m here for “girls loving girls, girls kissing girls, girls being friends with girls, girls helping girls.” Claire Legrand is blessing us in 2018. I really enjoyed Furyborn, but I think I’m going to absolutely love this one.

Girls of Paper and Fire by Natasha Ngan:
ARC – November 6th, 2018, by Jimmy Patterson Books
This is my third most anticipated release of the entire year. Asian inspired fantasy about two girls that are escaping a demon king but also falling in love? Okay, I feel personally attacked because that’s everything I’ve ever wanted in a book, honestly. I can’t see how that premise alone won’t make this book end up on my best of 2018 list come December.

Ruin of Stars (Mask of Shadows #2) by Linsey Miller:
ARC – August 1st, 2018, by Sourcebooks Fire
Mask of Shadows wasn’t my favorite read of 2017, but I’m always here for gender fluid main characters, and I hope this second installment completely wins me over. Especially now, since a big adventure should be happening!

They Both Die at the End by Adam Silvera:
This is actually the first ARC I was ever approved for on Edelweiss, but I requested it a couple days before it came out since I wasn’t sure if the site even worked like Netgalley. Well, it does, and it did, and now I’ve been sitting on an ARC of what I’m sure will be a masterpiece about two boys who are both told they are going to die. Also, this will be my first Adam Silvera book and I have no words to express how excited I am!

What If It’s Us by Becky Albertalli & Adam Silvera:
ARC – October 9th, 2018, by HarperTeen
And speaking of Adam Silvera, I then can’t wait to move onto this book that he cowrote with Becky Albertalli (Who I also haven’t read anything by)! And I believe this is also about two boys falling in love. Also, I am so obsessed with this cover. Talk about perfect color palette.

Blanca y Roja by Anna-Marie McLemore:
ARC –  October 9th, 2018, by Feiwel & Friends
After reading the first short story in All Out, I am now even more hyped for this sure to be masterpiece. Anna-Marie McLemore is one of my all-time favorite authors and I fully expect this to be one of the best books I’ll read in 2018, just like Wild Beauty was in 2017.

The Melody of You and Me (Lillac Town #1) by M. Hollis:
This is one of the very few pansexual representation books we have. A lot of people aren’t huge fans of it, because it’s hard to read, but I think that’s because English is not the author’s first language. But not only is this a f/f story featuring a pansexual lead, I am pretty sure one of the love interest is Filipina, and they fall in love in a book store. Like, that sounds like everything I’ve ever wanted.

But I hope to get to so many more queer reads in June, because I have so many on my backlist! And feel free to tell me your favorite LGBTQIAP+ book in the comments! Also, be on the lookout tomorrow for some of my favorite queer reads and recommendations! Happy reading and happy Pride, loves! 🌈

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April 2018 Book Haul

Hey, loves! I hope the end of your April is going well! I was so very privileged and blessed to receive some amazing books this month, and I’d love to share them with you guys! 💐💕


PURCHASED BOOKS:

The Wicked DeepReview: ★★★★
Dreadful Young Ladies
All Out AnthologyReview: ★★★★
Circe (US)Review: ★★★★★
Circe (UK)Review: ★★★★★


PURCHASED EBOOKS:

The ThiefReview: ★★★★
The Allure of Julian Lefray
Birthday GirlReview: ★★★
The Astonishing Color of After
Prince Charming
Bad Intentions


BOOK OUTLET:

Mapping the Interior
Binti: Home
We Are the Ants
The Tiger’s Daughter
If We Were Villains
The Traitor Baru Cormorant


PHYSICAL ARCS:

The Descent of Monsters
The Black God’s Drums
Mirage
The Wicked King
Girls of Paper and Fire
Worlds Seen in Passing

Yeah, best ARC I’ve ever received in my entire life. Forever so very thankful. I think I still am in disbelief. And this will be my first read in May, so expect a fangirl gush ASAP! 🧚


NETGALLEY ARCS:

All Your Perfects
Empress of All Seasons
Salt


EDELWEISS ARCS:

The Poppy War
For a Muse of Fire
What If It’s Us
Sawkill Girls
Damsel
Salt


BOOK SUBSCRIPTION BOXES:

Ace of Shades


Yeah, I know, I was so desperate for Salt that I requested it on two sites and got approved for both. I feel so bad, but I’m also so happy that I have an ARC of it! Edelweiss for sure showed up big for me in April! Actually, April was just an amazing month for ARCS in general. Hell, I can’t even properly form words to express how thankful I am that I was able to get my hands on a copy of The Wicked King this month. Diana, you’re the best, and I love you. But I hope April was filled with books that made you all feel the way The Wicked King makes me feel. Happy reading, loves! 💖📚

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